Hand Mates

I don’t know if this was something I heard or something I dreamt, but it was something about handshakes in a world after the pandemic.

For what it’s worth, I’ve never been overly fond of the practice. Historically, I’ve reciprocated when someone’s really wanted one, but I generally prefer alternatives. Anyway, someone was saying that handshakes will be obsolete in the wake of COVID, and that made sense to me. Then they went on to say that it was a ridiculous practice anyway because it was used in the dark ages or whenever by patriarchs who were marrying off their daughters in order to judge the virility and worthiness of potential mates for those daughters. And I thought “Wait. The fathers are trying to assess the sexual prowess of these suitors by what? The vigour of their handshakes?” That doesn’t seem quite scientific. Maybe this says something about me, but I feel as though I’m often far less attentive during a handshake than I am during mating. I don’t know.

What about you?

Bonus Question!

Best dowry!

Probably a horse? It’s probably like getting a sports car for a wedding present.